Emmett's What?
by Halen.Emmett.McCarty4Eternaty
Summary: The Cullen teens find a major secret being kept from them by Emmett. Now, a family secret confessions is what it takes to get Emmett to confess! T just in case.


**Title: **Emmett's what?

**Disclaimers: **I do not own the Twilight characters, or any other Twilight object, location, and whatnot. Any locations in this story that match to a real building, company, or anything else, aren't mine.

**A/N:** just a random story that popped into my mind. It's only a one-shot, so please enjoy this comedy!

"_Thou lovest righteousness, and hatest wickedness: therefore God, thy God, hath anointed three with the oil of gladness above thy fellows." ~ PSALMS, 45. 7_

* * *

"Emmett's what?" Rosalie asked blankly, her gold eyes going to Edward's golds.

Edward nodded surely, placing a plate in front of Bella who thanked him with a smile for the food she asked for...again. "I saw him, Rose. He was...listening to music and dancing to it in a very...odd fashion." He said delicately.

Alice sat back in her chair in shock. "I never would have guessed. He's just so...masculine and such."

Jasper nodded in shock, looking at the table in deep thought. "All the times we've been together though...he's never expressed anything like that. I know we're brothers, but wouldn't he at least express an interest?" He asked Edward.

"Most likely he did, but we never saw it. I couldn't believe it either, but I saw the signs of him being in hiding, and I thought we should consult this as a family before confronting Emmett at last." Edward told them and set down a glass of milk. "You should drink this glass, Bella. Carlisle says you need more calcium, and so does the baby." He said softly.

Bella nodded and rubbed her four month belly. "I'll make sure he gets some more than what I've been drinking lately. So, what is this about Emmett?" She asked, feeling lost once more.

It wasn't a big shocker to the Cullens to hear Bella wasn't following them. Since she found out she was pregnant, and the pregnancy progressed: she was rather...air-headed and slow to process things. Rosalie wondered how she would deal with the baby when she was so air-headed recently, but was sure she would be able to help her sister in caring for the child everyone was expecting very shortly. Vampires and humans usually didn't make babies, but Edward and Bella managed – which fit just fine in Bella's magnet life – and now the baby was just finishing up developing before he made his appearance in the world in about two months, maybe less depending on how fast he was developing inside Bella's human womb.

"We feel, Bella, that Emmett is hiding something from us which we really need to confront him about." Jasper commented firmly at the end. No one spoke firmly with Bella sine sometimes it made her burst into tears for no reason.

Rosalie blinked. "All these years we've been married...was I just a...figure head?" She sounded hurt.

Alice quickly consoled her sister. "Of course not, Rose! Emmett does love you!" She assured her.

"He really does, Rose. Maybe he wishes to be with you more than who he really wants to be with." Jasper assured as well.

Edward nodded. "Yes. I know he loves you. You're in his head all day," He paused shortly, "maybe he thinks of you hourly to make sure no _other_ thoughts get in." He thought it over.

Alice hummed. "it sounds accurate enough. I mean...why else would he imagine Rose naked twenty-four seven when he's not even horny?"

Rosalie gave a short thought before, "so...he's married to me to stay straight?" She asked.

"It's very possible." Jasper nodded, wondering why he never thought of it earlier after everything he had seen from his brother over the years.

Bella gave a blink as she swallowed her ice cream that was drizzled with blood and chopped cherries. "Are guys saying Emmett's gay and you never noticed?" She asked sweetly and with some confusion on how they never saw it before.

Everyone looked at Bella with unveiled shock. "You knew?" All four asked her.

Bella nodded. "I mean, isn't it obvious? He likes boy bands, the color pink is all he wants for curtains and pillow cases, he reads _Pride and Prejudice_ every Sunday, and he even likes shopping for my clothes and baby shopping with me." She listed off.

Rosalie should have known earlier, but it just slipped her mind due to her thinking of her just rubbing off on Emmett and wanting fashionable things. The book thing...well...he said everyone was reading it. No one read _Pride and Prejudice_ anymore, so that had to be a lie.

"Wow. What else did you notice of Emmett?" She asked her sister, wanting to be able to support her husband any way she could, even if if meant divorcing him so he could get a good boyfriend and show who he was. Dammit, she was his wife and she would support her bear any way possible!

Bella shrugged. "He thinks the baby should do ballet at least for a season." She told Edward who gave a furrowed eyebrow look back.

"I don't think he'll like ballet." Edward felt her belly, "nope. He wants to do baseball." He nodded at the baby's thoughts of doing what his daddy did.

"Ballet..._Pride and Prejudice_...pink curtains...baby shopping...shopping...it's all true and leads to one thing." Alice commented firmly.

Jasper nodded. "Emmett's gay." He finally said it.

"Emmett's what?"

The five heads turned to the kitchen doorway where Esme was standing with a bag of groceries and a bag of blood for Bella that she had gotten from the hospital for Bella.

"We discovered something very delicate about Emmett, Esme." Edward told her softly while she set the items on the counter before walking to them with some worry.

"What is it? Is he okay?" Esme asked quickly.

Rosalie patted her mother's arm. "Of course he is, Esme. He's immortal; but that's not what it is. We found out that...Emmett's hiding in the closet, and not being his true self." She said delicately.

Esme looked confused. "Hiding in the closet? You mean you think he's homosexual?"

"Yep." Jasper nodded shortly.

"We want him to know that we support him fully, and want him to show himself off as he truly is!" Alice said happily and full of moral support for her bear brother she was going to have fun shopping with.

"Exactly." Edward nodded with a grin and watched Bella softly as she dug into the top of her ice cream mainly for the blood on it. She had been craving it lately, and it was really helping the baby grow quicker than before. He knew that Bella wasn't even thinking of it as blood anymore; she was thinking of it as a delicious gravy that could be mixed with anything or nothing at all. Sometimes she was just too cute.

Esme looked very surprised now. "Really? I suppose I should have known. I mean, he was always wanting to shop with me recently for Bella's maternity clothing." She side nodded at the thought of her son being gay not so far fetched.

"Right?" Bella nodded in agreement.

"So we all agree to this? That we should confront Emmett as a family, and tell him to just come out already and be himself?" Rosalie asked the table, ready to talk to her husband.

"What about Emmett?" Carlisle asked as he came in the room with the sippy cup for Bella's blood since it was about that time for her to drink another cup.

"Emmett's gay and we know now." Jasper stated holding his breath as the blood on the counter was poured into the cup slowly.

Carlisle blinked, pausing in the pouring of the human blood. "Really?" He sounded just as surprised as his wife had been when he looked to Rosalie.

"He's using me to stay straight and off of his true persona. I don't blame him I guess. I mean, do you see how those humans treat homosexuals lately?" Rosalie rolled her eyes.

Esme nodded with her arms crossed. "Well, when he gets back, we'll confront him face to face as a family should, and give him all the support and love we should." She told them.

Carlisle hummed in agreement and gave Bella the cup with her thanking him softly before taking a small sip. "I agree, Esme darling. Emmett must be afraid to come out in the open because of what he thinks we feel about him. He's still the Emmett we all know and love, and he is to be treated as normal." He informed them firmly.

Alice nodded. "Right. We still love him and now we can all be closer together. We should do our secret telling too! To make him feel like he wasn't the only one hiding a secret, you know? I mean...don't we all have secrets that we're hiding from each other?" She asked honestly to her husband.

Jasper nodded with honestly. "I suppose so, yes. Maybe a good secret confessing could be good for us all." He grinned at Edward.

He nodded. "We could use the truth-telling time to make Emmett confess to being gay as well. It's a perfect opportunity for us all to be closer together as well before the baby's born." Edward looked to Carlisle and Esme.

Esme agreed to this fully. "Alright then, we'll all confess our secrets, big or small, and we'll give Emmett a wonderful opportunity to be himself from here on out."

Carlisle smiled. "Wonderful idea, darling. This will be a great thing to do before the arrival of the new Cullen."

Bella looked at them all. "Where are we going?" She asked her husband, showing just how air-headed she really was in this pregnancy.

Edward could only shake his head fondly at her and wonder how much longer before the baby's born so he would have his intellectual wife back.

* * *

"I whip my hair back and forth!" Emmett sang along to the song as he handed Esme a bag of clothes "Keep fighting until I get there!" He continued to sing along to his favorite song on his Ipod.

Rosalie watched her husband while she kept Bella company on the couch as they both watched their TV show together, staying close together as they could with how large Bella's belly was. Bella had her legs on Rose's legs and was playing with the ends of her long hair as she watched Emmett pass by with a swish of his hips. Both girls looked to each other and they finally understood how Edward finally decoded Emmett's actions.

Jasper was doing the same thing from behind his novel and wondered how he never saw this before. Alice, who was draped across his lap bodily with a magazine with her watched on as Emmett handed over more bags to Esme, telling them all that he got exactly what Esme asked for from the store. Both partners turned to each other and figured out their brother at last.

Edward and Carlisle were examining their family member and pondered over how Emmett was able to hide his homosexuality from a mind reader, a psychic, and an empath for this long when living together for years on end. Of course, both Cullen men were going to be very supportive in Emmett's sexuality, bu just thinking about him hiding this long amazed them to no ends.

"Bells, you'll love what I got you and the baby!" Emmett took out his ear buds and dug into a bag to hand over a book.

Bella took it curiously and blushed as red as a tomato as she glared at Emmett. "Gee, thanks, Emm." She tossed the book to the table.

Emmett just smiled widely and picked it up to toss it to Edward who thumbed through it with curiousness. "It's a perfect bonding time for baby and you! Ed and the baby can do different things, but the baby needs to bond with his mommy more than his father in this stage of his life, the infant stage!" He told her after recalling what he had read up on.

Rosalie knew everything was true after that when she read the title of the book.A Mommy's Guide to Safely Breastfeeding and Bonding with Baby.

Her husband really _was_ gay if he picked out this rather graphic book that she thumbed through.

"That was nice of you, honey, to buy her this book that is." Rosalie supported him instantly in the pick, getting a glare from Bella for letting him think it was okay to buy her a breastfeeding book.

"Thanks, babe. I remembered that Alice wanted those pants she had been dying to get her claws on, so," He tossed over the new stylish jeans to Alice who caught them and inspected them, "Voila! I would have gotten a top for it, but it just didn't work."

Alice saw the signs of a gay man coming out more. "Why? The jeans go with anything, Em." Alice claimed.

Emmett shook his head with a straight face. "No. Look, note to the oh wise, ass before boobs gets to jazz." He claimed in a sing-song voice before turning around to dig through the bags again.

Alice and Jasper shared a look that said they understood now. Emmett really _was_ gay...

Esme turned to her husband, silently telling him to tell their son what they were doing.

Carlisle nodded. "Emmett, son, we're having a family meeting tonight, and we're hoping to do this now since you're back." He spoke calmly to his son who stopped his bag shuffling.

Emmett blinked and turned to Carlisle with confusion. "uh, sure. Sounds fine to me, but why? The wolves causing trouble again?" He asked Edward mainly.

The first-made shook his head. "No, they've been rather quiet lately. We've decided that since we're having a new edition to our family very soon that we should...confide in one another, and have no secrets between us." He said it right there.

Emmett blinked again. "Oh. Okay, cool. Kitchen?" He asked everyone.

The Cullens agreed and relocated to the kitchen and sat at the table. Carlisle sat a the head of the table with Esme on his right and Edward on his left as normal. Bella was on Edward's right with Rosalie sitting next to her, and Emmett finishing at the head of the table on the opposite end of Carlisle. Alice was on Emmett's right and Jasper was in between Esme and Alice.

Emmett clapped his hands together with a gleeful smile. "Alright, who wants to share their secret first?" He asked.

Jasper, deciding that Emmett needed a boost in admitting his sexuality, raised his hand. "I'll go first. I'll tell something that Alice here doesn't even know about."He motioned to his wife who looked curious.

"Go ahead, Jazz. This will only improve our marriage!" Alice insisted.

Jasper agreed and then he said, "In 1923, Alice and I had gone to a beach together and got separated due to hunting reasons. I landed down the beach in a private area with a man and we had sex right there. I didn't even bite him or change him. We had sex and left it at that." Jasper admitted.

Alice blinked. "Was this a guy with blond hair and freckle on his neck?" She asked curiously

He nodded. "how did you know?" He asked, deeply curious on how the hell she knew what he looked like.

"I had sex with him, too." Alice admitted with a giggle.

"Really?" Jasper sounded surprised.

"Yep. I bit him though."

"Oh." Jasper sounded impressed as he shrugged it off. "there. I just went; who's next?" He asked the table.

Esme hummed. "Well, I suppose I can." She said dolefully.

"Fire away, Esme. This is all honesty and family support. I suppose it's marriage support as well." Carlisle insisted.

Esme nodded again. "Alright. Eleazar and I went to a human's party in 1963, and we both had tried that drug that they were handing everyone and I believe it worked on us both."

Edward blinked. "You got high off cocaine?" He asked with shock.

Esme looked to be blushing. "Yes. Eleazar did as well and that was the reason we didn't come back for three days. We wanted to hunt out the drug." She admitted.

Carlisle looked very shocked but he nodded. "Well, I suppose children aren't the only thing vampires are able to make and use." He blinked.

"Really?" Rosalie asked Esme, looking at her with a smirk.

She nodded.

"Wow." Bella blinked at what was happening.

"Alright then, I'll go next." Carlisle said calmly.

"Oh this will be good." Emmett chuckled in anxiousness to hear Carlisle's dirty secret.

Carlisle only chuckled. "I believe everyone minus Bella remembers the next door neighbor in 1944 in Denver?"

The table nodded, minus Bella who was listening in with innocent curiosity.

"Well, he had come to me asking to help him with his attic floor since he was wanting to refurbish his home before his wife and children moved in officially. I went to aid him, of course, and then we became intimate that one time that wasn't the last." He admitted to his wife.

Esme gave him a look. "Was this the man with a very pretty red-headed wife?"

"Yes the very one."

"His wife and I got together when you were at work every day." Esme admitted.

Carlisle gave her a look back that said very clearly; are you really my wife?

Jasper released a breath. "It seems it runs in the family, pops." He teased about both partners aiming for the ones that their spouse already used up.

Alice giggled as she tapped him. "Alright, Edward, we're going down the line here. You're next. Tell us any secret." She encouraged.

Bella looked to her husband. "I guess this is kind of like marriage counseling. I guess this can help us before the baby's born." She agreed to an extend on what they were doing. Some of the stuff she was hearing already was somewhat disturbing.

Edward nodded in agreement. "If only for our marriage and being honest with the family." He started.

The five siblings leaned in anxiously, wanting to know a secret about the Saint Cullen for once.

Edward sighed. He couldn't believe he was about to say this, but it was to help Emmett see that it was okay to be real. "Mike Newton is rather talented with his lips."

"I didn't need to know that." Bella commented with a shake of her head and a blank face instantly.

"Serious?" Emmett asked softly, looking at his brother in shock.

Edward nodded once and looked to the table in obvious embarrassment. If he was able to blush, he would be doing it right now.

"Was he your...you know? First job?" Rosalie asked him softly, still being supportive to the secret telling.

Edward shook his head, making all look at him in shock.

"Then who?" Alice asked supportive.

"Peter." He sighed heavily.

"That damn fucker! I told him to stay away from you!" Jasper growled in the name of his brother who enjoyed virgin boys a lot.

Bella looked to Jasper. "Was this the Peter that came to the house when I first told you all I was pregnant?" She asked, still somewhat horrified at what she was hearing from her angel of a soul mate who was so embarrassed.

Jasper nodded once, planning solidly a good berating of his brother for touching his baby brother.

"Well...he's cute." Bella supported her husband as she could in this situation.

Carlisle nodded. "I somewhat wish that he wasn't your first in a sense, but experimenting is experimenting, and all boys do it. Vampires or not." He assured his son who slunk down in his seat from embarrassment.

Emmett nodded, still in shock. "I guess I wish he wasn't your first either, but it's already done with. So, Bella, your next. Please." He begged her to move on with this thing to get it over with.

Bella shrugged. "What do I confess? I've never had sex other than my and Edward's consummation, and I was never into partying or anything like that. I never had sexual neighbors or anything, and Edward was my first kiss." She told them.

Rosalie thought about it. Bella was the real Saint Cullen this time around. "Well, have you ever touched a girl?"

"No." Bella told her truthfully.

"Uh, thought about touching a guy?" Alice asked as well.

Bella shook her head.

"Touching yourself?" Emmett asked her at last.

"No."

Jasper blinked. "Really? You've never touched yourself?" He sounded shocked.

Bella shook her head. "No. It never occurred to me to try it either. Edward took my first orgasm." She admitted.

"I did?" He sounded smug, a grin accompanying his smugness.

She nodded, letting her husband have his gloating moment.

Rosalie was shocked as well, but moved on. "Well, I guess I can confess that me and Alice did it a few times." She said honestly.

Both of the husbands looked to their wives, and Alice nodded in agreement to what Rosalie said.

"Wow, moving on. Let's get this done." Emmett begged everyone.

"I'll go, then you can go, Emmett." Alice told him, breaking the cycle.

Emmett waved her. "Sure, why not?" He muttered.

"Please let this be over." Bella begged in a prayer.

Alice ignored Bella. "Okay. In 2000, I wandered off of my hunting path and spotted two humans having sex, and I watched then went to Jasper to try out what they had done."

"Was that where that move came in?" Jasper asked her curiously.

Alice nodded. "Yep. I saw them and wanted to try it."

"You didn't do very terrible. It was very nicely done." Jasper commended her once more on the position they had done for the first time in 2000.

Alice smiled brightly. "Thank you, Jazz."

"Oh god let this end!" Emmett begged the ceiling, not wanting to hear anything more.

"Please, Emmett! Just tell them what they want to know and let's leave for ice cream!" Bella begged her brother to end this sex secret confession group.

Emmett looked confused. "Confess _what?_ I've certainly never done a guy, or been blown by anyone but Rose, and I certainly never had sex with neighbors or my brothers, or did drugs! What do I have to confess?!" He demanded them

"That you're gay!" Rosalie finally bursted out.

"I'M WHAT?" Emmett stood up quickly in outrage.

"Emmett, it's fine. We don't care about it either. We fully support you." Edward calmed the situation down.

Emmett turned to Rosalie. "What the hell, Rose? Why do you think I'm gay all of a sudden?" He asked his wife with big gold eyes.

Rosalie sighed. "I guess it's not all of a sudden. I mean...just think! You love pink." Rosalie told him.

"Because you like it." Emmett interrupted quickly.

"And you love reading _Pride and Prejudice_ on Sunday."

"What else can we do? Everything's always closed, and Bella likes to sleep in on Sundays because of her back!" Emmett defended himself again.

"You like shopping for clothes with Alice and Esme," Rosalie started to glare.

"Because they're fun to shop for! Alice likes all these punk shirts and I think they're really cute!"

"And you're going crazy for Bella and the baby!"

"WHO ISN'T?" Emmett explained loudly.

Carlisle stood up. "Alright, both of you relax. Emmett, this is an honest family time. We're aren't judging or trying to upset you in anyway." He insisted to his horrified son.

Emmett gaped. "guys, I'm not gay! So I like some pink in my life, and I love to shop with the girls, so what? And everyone is going crazy for the baby okay, so don't use that against me! I'm totally straight, I'm just really comfortable with my sexuality okay?" He told his wife firmly.

Rosalie crossed her arms. "Emmett, I already know you're gay. Just tell me and we can work this out." She demanded.

"I'M NOT GAY." Emmett insisted loudly.

Bella sighed. "I'm going out for ice cream. Emmett' come take me." She kissed Edward's cheek and gave him a look that said she would get it out of him.

Edward smiled back. "Alright, maybe a good calming session is needed." He said to everyone who agreed.

Emmett snatched his keys off the coffee table as Bella followed with her jacket that was bigger than last month's due to her growing child. "What assholes; telling me I'm gay cause I shop. What assholes." Emmett muttered to himself.

Bella rolled her eyes and was helped into the jeep carefully before Emmett sped to his side and started the jeep, and tore out the drive and down the road in silence.

After two minutes in silence, Emmett stopped at a red light and turned to Bella. "Do you think they bought it?" He grinned widely.

Bella laughed and bumped knuckles with him. "You'll never hear the end of this for a century, dude." She swore.

Emmett laughed with her. "Worth it. Number 1 on the bucket list: Make family believe I'm gay and lying about being straight – completed." Emmett laughed with Bella.

The light turned green and Emmett and Bella sped down the road in glee of actually making the family believe Emmett was gay. What a start of the new Cullen's life this was going to be.

* * *

_Just a funny one-shot I had in my head. I hope everyone laughed like I did!_

_-Halen_


End file.
